Lost

I knew going in to tonight's episode that there was a better than average chance that it was going to be a bit of a let-down. Not only was it coming right after the episode on Richard's backstory, (which was awesome) it featured Sun and Jin, the two characters I care about the least. Well I was right, it was boring and except for two small moments, very skippable.

In the sideways story we find out that Sun and Jin aren't married but are in love. Sun performs a little strip tease for Jin and we get a good look at what I can only assume are stunt boobs. The bad news is that sun's daddy found out about the affair and isn't happy. Remember that 25 large that Jin was bringing to the states that was confiscated at customs? Turns out that was for Martin Keamy and in return for the money he was to kill Jin. So Jin was given the responsibility of transporting his own blood money from Korea to the states by Sun's dad. Sucks to be you Jin.

Well the money is gone so Jin is taped up in a restaurant pantry while Sun tries to come up with the money. This of course is where we saw Jin at the end of Sayid's episode a few weeks ago. Sayid gives Jin a knife and leaves and Jin frees himself just as Sun and the mercenary tasked with taking her to the bank arrive. Jin and him get into a fight, shots are fired and Jin kills him but not before Sun is shot in the belly. As Jin takes her to get help she drops the bomb on Jin, "I'm pregnant". I'm sure daddy will be thrilled.

Back in the Island timeline, Widmore's people sedate all the people in Locke's camp and abduct Jin while Locke is away trying to gut Sun to come back with him. Once Jin wakes up he gets to talk to Widmore and he gives us the first of our small reveals in this episode. Widmore tells Jin that if Locke leaves the island then all of the people on the island and all of their loved ones "would simply cease to be." It didn't sound to me like Locke would kill them but that Locke could do something retroactively to the timestream so they wouldn't ever have existed. Maybe he has the power to wipe out all life on Earth. Who knows?

Back on the other island, when Locke finds out about Jin's kidnapping he grabs Sayid and heads off to rescue him but when he lands on the beach, Sayid is gone and Locke can't go past the pylons that Widmore's crew set up. Once Widmore actually arrives on the beach Locke threatens him with war. I certainly hope so because after this episode I'm ready for stuff to blow up. Once night falls we see the missing Sayid swimming silently towards the docked submarine and we get our second reveal of the night. The crew is getting a "package" off the sub and we see that it's a heavily sedated Desmond! That doubles his screen time for this season to about 15 seconds total. I can't imagine what Widmore needs with Desmond but I sure am looking forward to finding out.

24

Back for another hour in Jack's world! But this time all bets are off! That's right, with the announcement that this is the final season ever of 24 literally anything can happen. I remember how amazed I was way back in the first season that they killed his wife, (hero's wives are not supposed to die!) now who knows what will happen. Maybe his daughter will finally get eaten by that mountain lion. Maybe Tony will come back and die again. Maybe Chloe will smile. It's all on the table.

First off, let me just say how glad I am that the whole Dana Walsh sub-plot is going somewhere. Last episode we saw her kill Bill Prady and stuff him in a wall then call the bad guys and give them intel. Sure this is the upteenth time that CTU has had a mole (who is in charge of screening these people?) but at least there is a reason for her to be on the show. (I was just fast-forwarding through her scenes to get to the commercials!) Throughout the episode she is funneling info to the terrorists, knocking out satellites and generally making Jack and Chloe's day miserable. But enough about her, lets move on the star of the show.

When last we left our hero he had been gunned down while trying to draw the fire of the bad guys so Cole can get word to CTU about where the bomb is. He takes three to the chest and is defenseless on the street when Renee Walker shows up and takes out the last bad guy. Renee runs to Jack who looks dead but is really OK. We are told Jack was saved by his bullet proof vest but we know the truth. Jack is bullet-proof. Vests are for wussies.

With the scene locked down and the authorities on-site Jack gets a phone call from the President. How exciting! She wants Jack to oversee President Hassan's transport from the UN to the White House. Sure Jack's on the trail of a Nuclear bomb that could take out half of Manhatten but lets pull him off that and put him on a menial job that any one of a thousand Secret Service or Military personnel could do. That seems smart. But it's the President so what are you gonna do. Jack agrees and tells Renee what's going on and they share a little moment. Seems Jack really likes her. Look for her to kidnapped, tortured, raped and beheaded before the end of the season. I'm saying Jack's love interests don't do very well.

In the meantime, the bad guys call the Prez and give her the 411. Either turn over Hassan or the bomb goes blooey. Of course President Taylor isn't having any of that but some on her cabinet don't think that's the wisest move. In fact two members on her staff take it upon themselves to go behind her back and stage a kidnapping. That way they can turn over Hassan, remove the bomb threat, and the President can say that she didn't know anything. Just one problem with that, remember who was put in charge of the transport? That's right, Mr. Bauer himself. When General Brocker learns that Jack is heading up the detail he utters what will go down in history as the dumbest thing any character in the 24 universe has ever said. "He's going up against and elite team with the power of surprise. Bauer and his team doesn't stand a chance." Go back and read that again. Where has this guy been for the past 8 seasons?

Brocker and Weiss are downloading the relevant details from Ethan Hunt's laptop when Ethan walks in. He figures out what's going on and calls Jack but before he can say anything Brocker takes the phone but the damage is done. (How cool is it to have Jack Bauer on speeddial?) This one phone call combined with Jack's inability to get back in touch with Ethan makes his spidey-sense tingle. He turns his convoy of people around just as that elite team starts firing. Long story short, Jack goes all Jack Bauer on them and pretty much single-handedly takes out that "elite team" with "the power of surprise". Stupid General. He manages to leave one alive to learn who is responsible for this attack against the person of Jack Bauer and Friends and now I wouldn't want to be in Brocker or Weiss' shoes for all the cattle in Texas.

Finally we cut to guy with the bomb who sets it to explode in 15 minutes. Even though it is across town I have no doubt that Jack will get there in time to disarm it. Either that or Chloe will handle the situation with her humorless deadpan leet hacking skillz.

What did you think of the episode? Let me know in the comments!

Lost

Finally some answers! Kind of.

Tonight's episode was all about the enigmatic Richard Alpert, who he was and why in the world he doesn't appear to age. We finally got some of the answers we've been waiting for and were rewarded with pretty good story to boot.

The first thing we see is when Jacob greeted Ilana in her hospital bed and she is told to protect Jacob's six candidates. Jacob tells her that Richard (Ricardis?) will know what to. However, when Ilana actually asks Richard what to do he drops a bombshell on our intrepid Losties. He says that they are all dead and the island is actually Hell! And to make matters worse, he has no idea what to do next and thinks that he has been misled his entire life by Jacob. Not what you want to hear from the guy who is supposed to have all the answers!

Flashback to Richard's past and we learn that he is from Tenerife on the Canary Islands in 1867. (My first thought was "Oh great, another timeline to keep straight.") He is a married man with dreams of taking his wife to the New World and starting a family with her but she has fallen ill. In his desperation to save her, he rides to the doctor and begs for medicine to save her, but the doctor wants more money than he has. When Richard tries to get him to accept his prized possession, his wife's cross necklace, he tells him that it's junk and tells him to go. In a panic, Richard wrestles the medicine from the doctor's hand and in the tussle the doctor falls, hits his head on the table and dies. Richard races back home to find his wife already dead and Richard is arrested for murder.

While in jail, the priest comes and tells him to make confession for his sin before he is hanged but when Richard confesses the priest says he cannot absolve him because he must do penance and he doesn't have enough time. (On a pastoral note, that Theology is wrong. Christ forgives any man (or woman) who repents and puts his trust in Him to save him. Leave a comment if you have any questions.) However, when the priest finds out that Richard speaks English he sells Richard into slavery and Richard is chained aboard the slave ship, The Black Rock. The Black Rock is caught in a storm, smashes against the statue on the beach and is hurtled inland. (Answering such burning questions as "Where did the Black Rock come from?" and "How did the statue get smashed?" Left unanswered: "Is it plausible that a wave could throw a ship hard enough to smash a statue and fling it miles inland?" and "Where are the other pieces of the statue?")

As the crew of the ship comes to and assesses their situation they realize that they need to kill the slaves in the hold before the slaves try to kill them so the captain goes down and runs each of them through with his sword but before he gets to Richard we hear a familiar sound. Sure enough the smoke monster comes and kills all the crew but leaves Richard alive. (Not sure why. I don't think Richard was a candidate or under Jacob's protection because he didn't touch Richard until later in the episode. Maybe he recognized a kindred spirit because the smoke monster sees himself as Jacob's slave. Or maybe he just knew he could manipulate Richard into doing what he wanted.) That night Richard sees his dead wife Isabella who tells him that they are in Hell and the devil is coming for them. Before she can free Richard the black smoke comes back, Richard tells her to go but the black smoke gets her. Later the Man in Black comes to Richard and tells him that he will free him if he agrees to do whatever he tells him. Of course Richard agrees because let's face it, anything's better than starving to death while chained to the side of a ship. After the Man in Black frees him (with a set of keys he got off the officers body. Why didn't he just make the chains fall off like he did for Ben in the Dr' Linus episode?) they go make camp and eat some roasted boar.

After they eat, Man in Black gives Richard the same knife that Dogan gave Sayid and tells him to go to the beach and kill the man living there near the (now destroyed) statue (MiB tells him it's the devil) but not to let him talk, if he talks it's too late. So Richard heads down there but before he gets the chance to do any damage, Jacob beats him up and takes the knife. When Richard tells Jacob what MiB said and that he thinks he is dead and in hell, Jacob takes him to the ocean and forcibly dunks (baptizes?) him until he realizes that he is not actually dead. Thus Richard is recruited to Jacob's side and has the meaning of the island explained to him. Apparently evil (MiB) is like wine in a bottle and the island is like a cork that keeps the evil from escaping. Well that's clear. Still doesn't explain why Fake Locke doesn't just turn into black smoke and leave the island now that Jacob's dead.

Jacob says that he brings people to the island in order to prove that people are good while the MiB believes that people are already corrupted and sin because it's in their nature. (At this point I should probably be worried because I agree with MiB. Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity, and in sin did my mother conceive me. Psalm 51:5 We are born sinners.) Jacob then offers Richard a job. Since he doesn't want to interfere directly with the people he brings to the island, Richard will be his representative and let Jacob's will be known to the people. (Much like Christ was the exact representation of the Father and only did what he saw His Father do and said what His Father wanted Him to say.) In return, Richard wants his wife back but Jacob can't do that. (Because that's beyond the scope of his abilities? Because the black smoke got her earlier? Because he doesn't want to? Who knows) Then Richard asks for his sins to be absolved but Jacob can't do that either. So Richard asks to never have to die. This Richard can do. (That's a pretty specific power set.)

So Richard goes back to MiB, hands him a white stone (a gift from Jacob) and MiB tells him that if he ever wants to switch sides he always has a place by MiB's side. Then MiB gives him his wife's cross necklace back telling him he found it on the ship and leaves. Richard then buries the necklace presumably because he never got to bury his wife. Flash Forward to the present and Richard is digging up that necklace and shouts "I changed my mind! I was wrong! Does the offer still stand?". Thankfully before he can make the switch, Hurley shows up with his "I see dead people" power and lets Richard have a final conversation with his dead wife. Richard puts the necklace on and Hurley tells him the last thing his wife said which was that he has to stop the MiB from leaving the island and if he doesn't they will all go to Hell.

Pan over to Fake Locke watching the scene and we flashback to MiB just after his conversation with Richard. Jacob visits him and asks him why he tried to kill him and MiB says he just wants to leave and asks Jacob to let him go. Jacob says Fuggedaboudit as long as I'm alive and gives him a bottle of wine that MiB promptly smashes. Jacob says "I'll see you around" and MiB replies "Sooner than you think" which is what he told Richard a few episodes ago when he lowered him from the tree. Not sure what the significance to that is.

I love episodes like this that really answers some questions but leaves us wanting more. Richard has long been one of the most mysterious figures on the island and we know now a big chunk of his back story. With only 7 episodes left until the finale I'm not sure how they are going to fit the rest of the answers we need but I can't wait to find out. For the record, if this series ends anything like how Sopranos ended I would not want to be in the shoes of anybody connected with this show!

30 Rock

Last night's first scene of 30 Rock shows why this show is so well known for its originality. Jack is giving a presentation to the NBC employees about the upcoming merger with Kabletown and says they are a good company "even if they are from Philadelphia." Liz (also from Philly) takes offense and all of a sudden it's like an Eagles-Patriots game with Liz throwing snowballs at Jack and defending the greatness of Philly (Philly rules! Cheesesteak, Bobby Clark, Will Smith. Your town sucks!) and Jack returning fire with a battery and the high points of Boston (Boston Tea Party, Boston Cream Pie, Boston Rob Mariano!). Of course they all laugh when someone tries to defend LA (Michael Bay, Freeway, Legoland!). It's this off-centered quirkiness that endears the show to you and compels you to come back every week.

In tonight's episode we watch as a sex scandal unfolds for Tracy Jordan. No, he didn't sleep with a stripper, he talks about that every week. It's not that he slept with his kid's nanny or groupies or anyone else. For Tracy, that would all be acceptable and wouldn't be cause for alarm. The scandal that Tracy has to deal with is that he actually loves his wife and has never been unfaithful! All of his well-publicized sexual exploits were staged! Worst of all the media has gotten a hold of damning voicemails where Tracy calls his wife and asks her what to pick up from Bed, Bath and Beyond and how he can't wait to get home and be alone with her.

Such a great way to turn the typical celebrity scandal on its head and let us see what someone would do if he has to have an affair or his endorsements will leave him. He tries to seduce Liz but she's not having it. ("That's not going to happen for many reasons. Reason 1: I'm conscious. Reason 2: You smell like Icy-Hot. Reason 3:...") Liz is able to convince him that he should be thankful for the loving and devoted family he has and stop trying to cheat on them. (Liz:"You know what I have? A Sims family that keeps getting murdered") The interaction between Liz and the cast of crazies she is surrounded by is so great!

The funniest bit of the night? Jack creates porn for women. I's basically a channel of hot guys that will listen while women talk and say things like "I understand, That's so true, She's obviously jealous of you, You look pretty" for 24.95 a month. Operators are standing by! That was so good I had to interrupt whatever horrible reality show my wife was watching and show her. In fact I could see that really taking off with husbands buying it for their wives!

This show is so good, so well written and has confirmed my long-standing thesis that Tina Fey is a genius and deserves whatever awards and accolades her industry could throw at her.

Community

This show just gets better and better every week. From the ridiculous visual of Chevy Chase dressed in a sailing suit from the 70's to the racial humor that should be incredibly offensive but instead is somehow hilarious, this show keeps delivering funny lines and well crafted jokes.

Probably what resonates strongest with me are the racial stereotypes thrown out constantly. I was the youth pastor at a church that was ethnically diverse and am now the pastor of a church that has a mix of skin colors and our Wednesday night Bible studies often sound like some of the stuff said at the "Community" table. Take tonight's episode for instance. Pierce is going to take a one week sailing course for an easy credit and talks Shirley (a black woman) into joining him, Troy (A black man) says "A black on the water? This I gotta see" and joins the class. Then Pierce asks Abed to join by saying "Wanna join us? We got black people!" This is the kind of stuff that would get you killed if said around strangers or in public, but around friends it's acceptable because you know the hearts of the people speaking. It's real easy to do racial humor wrong and have the whole world against you but Community manages to find the balance between pushing the envelope and just being funny.

Tonight's episode was also funny for the movie references. Jeff, Abed and Annie take a pottery class that has one rule, no re-enactments of the famous pottery scene in "Ghost" and no singing of the Righteous Brothers song associated with it. Then he points at a poster of Patrick Swayze with a big red X over it. Sensing the class is a little taken aback by that the teacher says, "Oh it's OK. I had that made before he died." Again, using someone's death, especially if they have recently died, shouldn't be funny but it just is. Of course, because this is the only rule given in the class it is the first rule broken by Jeff who works on a guy's pot ala "Ghost" and when the teacher tries to throw him out he leaves singing Unchained Melody.

Meanwhile, over in the sailing class, Pierce can't do anything right and is in danger of making the entire class fail. The rule is that anything that falls off the boat is lost at sea and is gone forever even though the boat is in the middle of a parking lot because the nearest water in 2 and a half hours away. While trying to fix the sails, Pierce is knocked off the boat and the crew has to throw a life preserver to rescue him but a storm is coming and the crew has to decide whether to try and save him or sail out of reach of the (purely hypothetical) storm. In one of the funniest scenes I've seen in a long time, the crew decides to leave Pierce out at sea and not reel in the rope attached to the life preserver that Pierce is clutching. What makes this so funny is they aren't at sea and Pierce is on the ground four feet from the boat but this decision is made with all the gravitas of consigning someone to the icy waters of Davy Jones locker.

If you don't watch this show, do yourself a favor and start. It's smart, funny, well-written and well-acted. I haven't liked Chevy Chase in anything since the National Lampoon movies and he knocks it out of the park every week. Joel McHale is hilarious and every member of the cast is very smart and very good at their jobs. Abed alone is usually worth the price of admission every week, his comments and meta-commentary are always very funny. I have yet to watch a bad episode of this show and hope the cast and crew can keep up the good work.

Incredible Hulk #608

I remember when "Planet Hulk" was announced and I wondered if a big storyline centered around the Hulk would be any good. Turns out it was extremely good. Then "World War Hulk" was announced and I wondered if the Hulk could support a big summer crossover event. Turns out it was even better than "Planet Hulk". So when "Fall of the Hulks" was announced I was really looking forward to it. Turns out that it's pretty much horrible and at times unreadable.

This issue has the final assault on the Intelligensia's reconfigured HeliCarrier and showcases some of the problems. It seems everyone has a plan but we don't really know what it is. It's hard to be taken by surprise by some plot twist if you weren't really sure what direction the plot was headed in anyway. Skaar has the sense to start asking what the plan is (Albeit not until they are in the middle of a huge fight) and seems satisfied when he really isn't given an answer, just more vagueness. What makes this more incredible is the bad guys have already captured Dr. Doom, Henry Pym, Reed Richards, and Hank McCoy but Banner's going to able to outsmart them? He's a theoretical physicist, not some strategical savant. You want to know how quarks and protons interact with Gamma radiation? Ask Banner. You want to know how to attack a team of ultra-smart bad guys? Don't ask Banner because he has no experience with that, at least until this story line.

Of course everything goes wrong, Banner is captured and the heroes are "Hulked-out". Not sure why the bad guys want to turn everyone into super-strong monsters but I guess we'll see. The bad part is we have no idea if this Banner's plan or not. Maybe this is exactly what was supposed to happen, maybe not, who knows.

The back up story was even more ridiculous. Red She Hulk vs. Electra and Domino. After the first attacks on Red She Hulk all her clothes fall off. I'm sure that always happens. So she get her hands on Domino and does she hit her? No. She strips her clothes off. Am I reading someone's wet dream? Is this fan-fic? Was this written by a twelve year old? Just terrible. I feel like even though Greg Pak and Harry Wilcox are credited with writing this issue, the blame for this needs to fall at the feet Jeph Loeb. This just feels like his level of "character development".

The good news is that this is the conclusion to "Fall of the Hulks" and next month starts "Hulked out Heroes". I hope this all gets much better real quick.

COVER BY: John Romita JR.
WRITER: Greg Pak
Harry Wilcox
PENCILS: Paul Pelletier
Ryan Stegman

Justified

OK I had last night's episode on DVR from last night because I just couldn't get to it with all the Lost and Parenthood goodness so this is a little late coming but WOW is this a great show! Is there anyone else on the planet that does smoldering anger better than Timothy Olyphant? Answer: No. This is definitely going to the top of my must watch list, I'm just not sure how to fit it in to an already packed Tuesday.

Tonight's episode starts with U.S. Marshall Raylan Givens (Olyphant) on a hotel patio in Miami telling a drug kingpin that the 24 hours he gave him to leave town are almost up. He can either hop on the next flight out to South America or Givens would shoot him. Of course the drug dealer's not having any of that so he pulls his gun but Givens is the faster draw and kills him before he can get a shot off. This sets off an internal investigation into the shooting with the final result being Givens is shipped out to the Marshall's office in Lexington, Kentucky. Just so happens that Givens grew up in nearby Harlen and is very familiar with the area but doesn't like the idea that he has to come back.

When he arrives he finds out one of his old buddies he used to work in the coal mines with, Boyd Crowder (Walton Goggins), has become a Neo-Nazi that likes to blow up churches with bazookas and rob banks. He also had a brother that had just been shot and killed the night before by his wife. Givens figures he should go call on the wife and wait for brother Boyd to stop by but Boyd sends one of his men instead so Givens tells him to go back and tell Boyd that he's in town and is going to be seeing him soon.

When they do finally meet up each man takes the measure of the other, sizes him up and wonders how exactly they got to such different places though they started from the same beginning. Givens tells Crowder to show up at court the next day for a line up, which he does, then Crowder tells Givens he has 24 hours to leave town or he will kill him, a nice reversal from the deal Givens gave the druglord at the beginning of the episode. Of course, being a Nazi Crowder doesn't really feel obligated to give Givens the entire 24 hours so he goes to his brothers house and makes his widow call the Marshall over for dinner. Then, in one of the dumbest moves I've seen in a while, sends the widow away while he makes Givens sit and eat his "last meal". Why is this so dumb? Well this woman has already killed one brother with her shotgun, what makes him think she won't kill another? Sure enough, here she comes around the corner with a shotgun and shoots Crowder. Unfortunately she doesn't kill him as it looks like this is the beginning of a long story arc with these characters and not just a one and done story then off to the next case.

Admittedly the main draw for this show is Olyphant staring down bad guys then being quick on the draw but my goodness that appears to be enough. Not only that but it looks like they have surrounded him with enough talented actors to give this series legs and keep it going for a long time. If you missed this show go find it on FX, I'm sure there will be encore showings all week, and watch it. It will be well worth your time.